It’s been about a week since my last post on this topic. As night fasting has become rapidly easier for me, I have become less enthusiastic about writing for some reason. Challenges still abound and in terms of the fast the challenge is waiting to eat in the morning, and feeling really ready to eat before my 14 hours is up. I am sticking to the agreement of a 14 hour fast period; It’s green juice and tea until 9 am and solids after that. (later in this post I let the challenge of some not so raw, not so healthy eating habits out of my comfy, cozy and quiet closet.)
With less than a week to go until I complete this agreement my mind is already going into what I will choose to do once the “agreement” period is up. I love how light my body feels at night and before I go to bed without the extra load in my belly and guilt on my mind. Plus I know that at night our bodies are in detox mode and do not function efficiently in digesting food. I like feeling that I am honoring and respecting my body’s true needs. It’s definitely a step in the right directions in terms of what I really want for myself and what I want to reflect out into the world.
All that said, what I have been thinking and feeling is that after the 30 days are up, I will continue to stop eating at 7 pm. If it is a bit later so be it, but I would like to choose that regularly 7 pm is when the kitchen closes for the night.
As far as the morning routine goes, I love starting my day with a green juice. No matter what else I eat throughout the day I know I’ve already had a nice big helping of greens. Not to mention that when I start my day on a healthy, green note the rest of the day tends to want to stay in harmony. It then feels best to give my body at least 30 minutes to digest the juice, after which I enjoy a cup of Mate` or green tea with some honey and “mylk”. Once I’ve had my tea I’m satiated for a good 30 – 45 minutes at which point my body is asking for food. Stretching myself also feels important at certain times, but not necessarily on a regular basis. My son wants to play and my body wants some fuel so that I can play. We wake up between 5:30 and 6 am and I’ve found that waiting 3 hours is just a bit much for me.
What feels instinctively good is to bring the 14 hour fast down to 12 hours “on” and 12 hours “off” (once I’ve completed the 30 days). Listening to that instinctive voice is a muscle that has become atrophied for most of the “Western” world, and I for one want to rapidly awaken it’s latent abilities to guide me through the map and maze of life.
Back to the present moment; Outside of feeling good about the night fasting, I’ve felt a little frustrated the last few days. In the beginning of this fasting journey I seemed to have shed excess weight very quickly. The importance of disciplining my mind and body’s relationship to food is about creating healthy habits – not to lose weight. But, I did and do enjoy the added benefit of lightening up and coming into my bodies natural figure with healthier, more balanced eating habits and routines. The lightening up that was going on in the beginning has seemed to slow down. I’m really trying not to let it get to me, and one could say my body just reached it’s ideal weight, but I am aware that I have maintained some not great habits that have nothing to do with eating at night, and are probably catching up with the weight loss response to my night fasting.
I am hesitant at the thought of being so vulnerable as to tell you my dirty little habits, but I am going to lay it all out on the table and just be real! In previous posts I had mentioned that because I was not getting my dessert at night I had starting eating more sweets in the day to make up for it. Well, that has not stopped by any means. I’m mainly just eating them midday and I don’t think I’m having as much as I was having when I first started, but I do think having them at all is not supporting my bodies health and vitality, let alone ideal weight. Nothing I just said is that big of a deal, but what I am about to share with you may be a bit shocking to some of you, being that you may expect me to be some super raw food or at least whole foodist – which I strive for and truly believe in. But, some tempting habits sneak in every so often and tend to stick around for a while.
My most recent guilty habit is centered around 2 local bakeries, 1 much closer to home than the other. I should also mention that I LOVE a good latte, and even back in the states I was most recently getting 1 to 2 lattes a week. In general I know my body is much happier without regular doses of caffeine, especially from coffee and one of these days I will bring myself out of this habit, I’ve done it before and I will do it again . In the mean time, when I put a love for the flavor of, and easy access to great espresso together with being a full time Momma who’s not getting enough sleep, the addictive latte habit has gone into full swing.
Back to the bakeries, mainly the local one Lechem Shel Tomar. Lechem Shel Tomar is an Artisan bakery with fresh sour breads and pastries made daily. It happens to be right across the street from a park that I take my son to just about every morning. After our park excursion I’ve made a nasty and delicious little habit of going to this bakery, getting a latte, a biscotti and a piece of their little health bar which is oats, dates, maple syrup, honey some nuts and cranberries (it’s really good and I will be making an even healthier version of it soon). Sometimes I’ll get a freshly baked sourdough roll, or a piece of their chocolate ganache bar or truffle…….I have a serious sweet tooth. Many times I will eat all of those with my latte while Hodie is taking his midday nap, and I am working on a little writing, researching or just perusing through the wide, wide world of online happenings.
If you are rolling your eyes, I do understand. If you are not and are more like “I totally get you, I have similar weaknesses, you’re not alone”, please do leave a comment!!!! Anyhow, this has become a lovely and sinful little habit. I have my latte sitting right in front of me now, with the baggy that held the biscotti and health bar….all in my belly.
There it is. That my friends has definitely been holding me back from embodying more of my brilliance. Don’t get me wrong, I am not an extremist, which perhaps is why I’ve gotten myself into these sweet and sticky situations. But, I love the brilliant foods people create, and I love tasting them. I love letting them inspire me, and then I love to go home to try and figure out a way to make something just as indulgent that’s raw and mostly vegan that I can enjoy guilt-free and share with you! The problem comes when I allow it to become a habit rather than an occasion, which is what I have been doing recently.
This brings me to my next upcoming “LV agreement”. I have not worked out the exact details, but I will post on it soon enough. Basically it will have something to do with sweets and processed grains. It will feel really good to be making all of my own desserts and breads from whole ingredients. This week I made some of the best buckwheat crackers ever (recipe coming in a future post), I have sprouted rye berries fermenting in an apple cider vinegar solution to become some sort of a raw bread or pizza crust. I know the trick is making enough in advance and having the good stuff on hand. I am ready to take honoring my body to the next level, and I feel extremely grateful for having taken on this 30 day agreement in such a public way. It really has held me accountable in a way that just doing it on my own wouldn’t have.
I thank you again for being witness to my journey of Living Vision and I welcome your supportive feedback.